drawing | plates

i wrote in my diary : i cannot deny who i am, nor what i am, nor should i try being some'uk else. and i sighed. next i made us some dinner on plates. i'm telling you, deciding to do an open house does rattle my cage. i've been drawing tiny and bigger designs, trying to find what it is i'm gonna show, and i'm getting a little jittery. by little i mean alot. 

what am i? what am i doing? who cares? not my usual pep talk then. i suppose i need to work through this, before i'll really be getting somewhere. then i read an article on the island of saint helena (five hours boat trip off the african coast towards brazil). i read it and i came back up for air. 

no mobile reception to speak off on saint helena. just four thousands residents who call themselves volunteers. secluded from yet not immune to global change since youngsters on the isolated isle have as little trust in the future here as in most places elsewhere {not wanting to accuse youngsters per se, it just dawned upon me some laws are universal}.  

the article both intrigued and scared me. it did also free me of creative phobia. if i cannot do an open house, then i won't (but i want to). and if i don't, that will be fine. in the meantime it is key to go on in the way samuel beckett wrote : i can't go on, i'll go on. or, it is what it is {i heard robert de niro utter that once. it sounded sexy} .

i have a cookery book with plates in it. it is called "plates" cookbook, can you believe it? the book has many plates in it, besides recipes. i've added some of the plates here. slinky, not? i can't bring myself to cut up this book. instead i'll be cutting some more words and use my new glue pen. i might build a plate myself. joke's drawing challenge this weekend.